10 Ways to Support Your Teen’s Mental Health
By Melody Wright, LMFT
Some days it feels like the world is spinning faster than any of us can keep up. And for teens, the weight can feel especially heavy. Between school demands, pressure about the future, navigating friendships, constant social media exposure, and the endless stream of news…it’s a lot.
As a parent, you might notice your teen pulling away like spending more time in their room, giving one-word answers, or meeting your questions with sass instead of conversation. Maybe they seem moody or unpredictable, and as a parent, it can be hard to watch and not know how to help.
Your teen is in one of the most important seasons of life, discovering who they are, testing boundaries, and trying on different versions of themselves, all while the outside world keeps demanding more and more.
Social media tells them who they should be.
School tells them what they need to achieve.
Friends and family may have expectations too.
It’s no wonder so many teens are struggling with enormous stress, anxiety, and self-esteem. Did you know that, according to Transforming Education, roughly 60% of students report feeling stressed every day?
Here’s the important part: it’s completely normal if your teen is feeling overwhelmed.
Their nervous system is simply responding to stress, like their body is on high alert, bracing for what’s next. For some teens, that can look like giving short, low-effort responses when you try to talk with them, or retreating to their room and sleeping a lot more than usual.
That stress doesn’t just affect their mind; it affects their body too. The good news is that there are ways to support your teen that work with their body, not against it.
Protecting mental health isn’t about ignoring challenges or pushing harder. It’s about learning to regulate their nervous system, build self-esteem, and create space for authenticity, even in a chaotic world.
If your teen seems stressed, withdrawn, or overwhelmed, here are 10 ways you can support them.
10 Ways to Support Your Teen’s Mental Health
1. Help Them Manage Stress Before Big Events
Tests, presentations, and even difficult conversations can really send your teen’s body into overdrive.
One way you can help is by encouraging simple grounding tools.
For some teens, it’s carrying a stone or coin in their pocket and running their fingers over it when they feel nervous.
For others, it’s slowing down to take a few deep breaths together. These little practices might seem small, but they can make a big difference in helping your teen step out of worry and back into the present.
2. Create Space Beyond Social Media
Scrolling through Instagram or TikTok can leave teens feeling like they’ll never measure up.
Instead of focusing only on limiting screen time, invite your teen into something fun that pulls them into the moment, like going for a drive, cooking together, playing a game, or just hanging out doing something they enjoy.
These moments naturally give them a break from scrolling without it feeling like a punishment. You can also model balance by putting your own phone aside during these times, showing that making room for joy and connection matters for everyone.
3. Celebrate Small Wins
Your teen doesn’t need a huge achievement to feel capable.
Confidence grows in little steps.
Pay attention to what they’ve got on their plate, and notice the effort they’re putting in, whether that’s finishing a big assignment, showing up to practice, or even just pushing through a tough day.
When you celebrate those small wins, like saying, “I know that project was a lot, let’s grab ice cream to celebrate”, you’re showing your teen that their effort matters. Those moments of being seen and valued remind them that progress doesn’t have to be big to be meaningful.
4. Support Authentic Self-Expression
Teens often feel pressure to fit in, and it can be hard for them to fully express what they enjoy.
One of the most supportive things you can do is show genuine interest in what lights them up. If they’re into anime or K-pop, watch or listen alongside them.
If they love a video game, grab a controller and play, even if you’re not good at it. If they have a hobby, help them dive deeper, whether that’s booking a concert, visiting a comic store, or signing them up for a class.
When you lean into their interests with them, you’re showing that what matters to them matters to you, and that kind of connection helps them feel valued and understood.
5. Build Predictable Routines
Life can feel unpredictable for teens, and routines bring a sense of stability, but these work best when your teen helps create them. Instead of setting the schedule for them, sit down together and ask questions that guide them toward what feels doable:
“When do you usually have the most energy?”
“Would you rather do your weekly chores on Saturday morning or Sunday?”
“After school, would you want to rest and eat first before homework, or dive right into homework?”
“Based on your schedule, what’s the best day to do your laundry?”
Once you’ve mapped out some rhythms, check back in after a week or two to see how they feel about it. Maybe they’ll realize, “I actually don’t like doing laundry on Wednesdays—I’d rather try Sunday mornings.”
Supporting them in this process not only helps them build routines that stick, but it also shows them they have a voice in shaping how they move through their days. If you would like to learn more about building routines and how they can support with overwhelm, check out our blog, How to Build a Daily Routine to Support Overwhelm.
6. Normalize Rest (Without Guilt)
Our culture often glorifies productivity, but rest is what truly restores the nervous system. Many teens feel like they always need to be “on”, rushing from activities to homework to tests without slowing down. For these teens, it can help to encourage intentional downtime: a nap after a long day, a quiet moment with no expectations, or simply giving permission to pause.
On the other hand, some teens spend a lot of time at home but still struggle to feel rested or motivated. In those cases, it’s worth gently exploring their sleep habits, like whether they’re staying up late and dragging through the day. Sometimes helping them set up a better sleep rhythm is the first step toward more energy and focus.
And in either case, modeling rest yourself, closing the laptop, putting the phone away, or taking a real break, shows your teen that rest isn’t lazy, it’s part of staying healthy.
7. Pay Attention to Social Dynamics
Friendships during the teen years can be complicated.
A hangout that’s fun one day might feel tense the next, and it’s not always obvious to a parent what’s going on.
Instead of labeling certain friends as “good” or “bad,” you can support your teen by creating space to talk about how different interactions make them feel.
That might look like asking gentle questions about conflict, noticing if they seem uneasy after certain social situations, or talking about what it means to feel safe and respected in a friendship.
Over time, these conversations can help your teen build awareness of the relationships that lift them up and recognize when a dynamic might be crossing into unhealthy territory.
We understand that talking with your teen might come with some challenges; that’s why we wrote a blog on ways to navigate those conversations. To learn more, check out Keys to Connection: Navigating Parent-Teen Communication.
8. Connect Mental Health to Nourishment
Teens don’t always connect how what they eat, or how much they sleep, affects how they feel. Skipping meals, relying on caffeine, or staying up late can all make stress and mood swings worse.
You can start these conversations early by talking about what’s good for the brain and body, and why both food and rest are essential fuel.
Encourage your teen to keep balanced meals, hydration, and regular sleep on their radar, not as rules to follow, but as tools that help them feel their best.
9. Model Self-Compassion Over Self-Criticism
The harshest voice many teens hear is their own. When they criticize themselves, their body reacts as if under attack.
Parents, your teen is listening to what you say, how you speak about them, AND how you speak about yourself.
So show your teen what compassion looks like; name your own mistakes gently, highlight their strengths, and encourage them to treat themselves with the same kindness they’d offer a friend.
10. Notice and Celebrate Everyday Joys
Life can feel heavy for teens, and joy often gets pushed aside. But small moments of joy are essential for balance.
Encourage your teen to notice the things that make them smile, laughing at a joke, hearing a favorite song, or watching the sky at sunset. These little sparks remind their nervous system that life isn’t all stress, and that relief and connection still exist even on hard days.
Just as important is creating regular spaces to connect. Since evenings can fly by with homework, dinner, and winding down, think about small rituals that invite conversation, like sitting at the table together without screens, taking a Saturday walk, or using car rides as a chance to catch up.
Some parents even keep a nightly check-in routine, chatting for a few minutes before bed. These rhythms don’t have to be long, but they show your teen you’re available, curious, and ready to listen.
Final thoughts
Parenting a teen today comes with so many unknowns. You want to protect them, but you also know they’re figuring out who they are and learning to stand on their own. It’s not easy watching them carry stress, and it can leave you wondering if you’re doing enough.
What I want you to remember is this…your teen doesn’t need you to have all the answers.
What they need most is your presence, your encouragement, and your willingness to walk alongside them as they navigate this stage of life.
Those small moments of support, listening without judgment, encouraging rest, celebrating little wins, and reminding your teen they’re not alone matter more than you might think. In our household, we talk about being a team: when one person is struggling, the others step in to help carry the load.
That could mean taking care of chores when someone’s sick, or simply being there with love and encouragement on a hard day. When your teen knows your family shows up for each other, even in the tough moments, it reinforces that they are cared for, supported, and never facing things on their own.
And if it feels like your teen is carrying more than they can handle on their own, you don’t have to figure it out alone. Therapy can give them a safe place to process, learn practical tools, and build confidence in themselves.
At Life By Design Therapy™, we have therapists who specialize in working with teens and young adults. Our therapists help them regulate their nervous system, ease the pressure they’re feeling, and step into a stronger sense of self.
Your teen deserves support. And you deserve to feel supported as a parent, too. We’d be honored to walk with you and your teen through this season.
Affirmations to Share with Your Teen
I’m growing a little every day, and that’s enough.
I can handle challenges one step at a time.
Being myself matters more than fitting in.
My voice has value, even if it sounds different from others.
My worth isn’t tied to grades, likes, or achievements.
Additional Resources
**If you’re interested in learning more about mindfulness and living intentionally, check out these books below:
The Conscious Parent: Transforming Ourselves, Empowering Our Children by Dr. Shefali Tsabary
How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish
Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by Dr. Kristin Neff
Radical Acceptance: Embracing Your Life with the Heart of a Buddha by Tara Brach
Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself by Nedra Glover Tawwab
**Some product links are affiliate links, which means we'll receive a commission if you purchase through our link, at no extra cost to you. Please read the full disclosure here.
10 Signs You Grew Up with Emotionally Unavailable Parents & How to Start Healing
By Melody Wright, LMFT
Have you ever felt like you’re carrying invisible baggage from your childhood like patterns, feelings, or struggles you can’t quite explain?
Maybe you’ve even caught yourself wondering,
Why do I struggle to feel seen or heard in my relationships?
Or
Why do I struggle to ask for help or trust others?
If these thoughts resonate, you’re not alone.
The effects of growing up with an emotionally unavailable parent often show up in subtle, and persistent ways, kind of like a shadow following you through life.
Over time, this emotional void can shape your sense of self and the way you navigate relationships, often in ways that you may not fully realize until adulthood.
These traits don’t mean there’s something wrong with you; rather, they’re a testament to your resilience and your ability to adapt to a challenging environment.
This blog isn’t about blame, it’s about understanding.
By exploring these common traits, my hope is that you’ll feel a sense of validation and connection.
You are not alone in your experiences, and by recognizing these patterns, you can take meaningful steps toward healing, self-acceptance, and healthier relationships.
Let’s dive into the ten traits that might feel all too familiar and explore how they came to be.
10 Signs You Grew Up With Emotional Unavailable Parents
You Struggle to Express Your Emotions
If sharing your feelings feels unnatural or even scary, it’s not because something is wrong with you.
If you grew up in an environment where emotions were dismissed or ignored, you likely learned to suppress them for survival.
Because of this, you may have disconnected from your emotions entirely to protect yourself from hurt.
How to Begin Healing and Growing:
Give yourself permission to feel. You can start by simply acknowledging your emotions without judgment.
Try journaling or using an emotions chart to reconnect with your inner world.
Share small pieces of your feelings with someone you trust, reminding yourself that it’s okay to start slow.
You Feel Like You Have to Do Everything Alone
If you identify as someone who is fiercely independent, there’s a chance your parents were unavailable to you or even made you feel like a burden.
If this feels familiar, you may have learned early on that asking for help wasn’t an option.
While that independence is a testament to your strength, it may also leave you feeling isolated.
How to Begin Healing and Growing:
Start small by asking for support in low-stakes situations, like help with a household task.
Reflect on the people in your life who have shown they’re reliable and safe, and practice leaning on them gradually.
Take time to remind yourself that allowing others to help isn’t a weakness, it’s an act of trust and connection.
You Try to Keep Everyone Else Happy
Do you find yourself bending over backward to make others happy, even at your own expense?
If this resonates, you might have grown up in an environment where love felt conditional.
Pleasing others might have been your way of avoiding conflict or earning approval.
How to Begin Healing and Growing:
Pause before saying yes to anything and ask yourself, “Am I doing this because I want to, or because I feel like I have to?”
Practice setting small boundaries, like turning down a request, and notice how it feels to honor your needs.
Remind yourself that your worth is not tied to what you do for others.
You Struggle to Feel Good About Yourself
When emotional validation is lacking in childhood, kids often internalize it as a reflection of their worth.
If you’ve ever felt like you’re not “enough,” not good enough, smart enough, or lovable enough, it’s okay.
Many people share this experience. Please know that those feelings of unworthiness don’t define you.
How to Begin Healing and Growing:
Challenge negative self-talk by practicing self-compassion. Speak to yourself like you would a close friend.
Surround yourself with people who celebrate you for who you are, not just what you do.
Practice affirmations that remind you: I am enough, just as I am.
Utilize the R.A.I.N technique - read more about that HERE.
You Value Connection & Fear Losing It
Feeling like people might leave you can be overwhelming.
Growing up with emotional neglect may have created a deep fear that connection isn’t safe or lasting.
Did you know this fear isn’t a sign of weakness?
It’s actually your mind and body trying to protect you.
How to Begin Healing and Growing:
Notice when fear of rejection arises and remind yourself that your past doesn’t dictate your present.
Practice open communication with loved ones about your fears—it can help build trust and understanding.
Consider working with a somatic therapist to explore where these fears come from and how to rewrite the narrative.
You Find It Hard to Set Boundaries
Does saying “no” feel impossible or asserting your needs brings up feelings of guilt?
Many adults who grew up with emotionally unavailable parents learned to prioritize others’ needs while ignoring their own.
But your needs matter, too.
How to Begin Healing and Growing:
Start with small boundaries, like taking 10 minutes of alone time when you need it.
Practice saying something like, “I can’t do that right now, but I appreciate you asking”, to build confidence.
Remind yourself that boundaries don’t push people away, they strengthen relationships by cultivating mutual respect.
You’re Drawn to Emotionally Unavailable Partners
Do you find yourself in relationships where your needs aren’t met, yet you stay, hoping things will change?
It’s not your fault.
We often unconsciously gravitate toward what feels familiar, even when it’s painful.
How to Begin Healing and Growing:
Reflect on what feels familiar in your relationships and ask yourself if it serves you.
Seek relationships that demonstrate consistency, empathy, and emotional availability.
Start with you. Work on loving and validating yourself first, so you’re less likely to seek it from unavailable people.
You’re Consistently on Edge in Relationships
Do you constantly anticipate conflict or withdrawal, even when there’s no clear reason?
Growing up in an unpredictable environment can train your nervous system to stay on high alert.
This hypervigilance may have been your way of staying safe as a child.
Remember to have compassion for yourself as you navigate regulating your nervous system.
How to Begin Healing and Growing:
Practice grounding techniques, like deep breathing or mindfulness, to calm your nervous system.
Remind yourself that not every change in mood signals danger, it’s okay to pause before reacting.
Therapy like EMDR and Somatic can help you retrain your brain to feel safe in healthy, stable relationships.
You Find It Hard to Trust People
If trusting others feels impossible, it’s not because you’re “broken.”
When caregivers were unreliable or dismissive, you likely learned to rely on yourself.
Trusting others now can feel risky, but it’s a skill that can be developed.
How to Begin Healing and Growing:
Start small by noticing who in your life has shown consistency and care.
Practice sharing little pieces of yourself and see how others respond. It’s okay to go slow.
Reflect on the fact that trust grows in increments, not all at once, and that’s okay.
You Feel Like You Have to Be Perfect
If you’ve spent your life striving for perfection, it might be because you felt like nothing you did was ever “good enough” growing up.
Overachieving might have been your way of trying to earn love or avoid criticism, but it’s a heavy burden to carry.
How to Begin Healing and Growing:
Celebrate progress over perfection, and acknowledge the effort you put in, even when things aren’t flawless.
Give yourself permission to rest and remind yourself that your value isn’t tied to what you achieve.
Work on embracing imperfection as part of being human, it’s what makes you real and relatable.
Final Thoughts
The traits you’ve developed aren’t flaws, they’re survival mechanisms that helped you navigate a challenging environment.
Here’s the good news, they don’t have to define you anymore!
With awareness, self-compassion, and support, you can begin to rewrite the patterns and step into a life where your emotional needs are met, both by yourself and others.
Healing is a journey, but every small step is a testament to your strength and resilience.
You are worthy of love, care, and connection, and it’s never too late to begin.
If you’re ready to take that next step, therapy can provide a safe and supportive space to guide you on your journey.
Reach out today and let’s begin this process together.
CLICK HERE to schedule a phone consultation.
This Weeks Affirmations
I am enough, just as I am. I don’t need to prove my worth.
I can embrace imperfection as a part of being human.
My past shaped me, but it doesn’t define who I am today.
I deserve relationships where I feel seen, heard, and valued.
It’s okay to ask for help. I don’t have to do everything alone.
Additional Resources
**If you’re interested in learning more about growing up with emotionally unavailable parents check out these books below:
Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect by Jonice Webb
Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by Dr. Kristin Neff
Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love by Dr. Sue Johnson
The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self by Alice Miller
**Some product links are affiliate links, which means we'll receive a commission if you purchase through our link, at no extra cost to you. Please read the full disclosure here.
Keys to Connection: Navigating Parent-Teen Communication
By Melody Wright, LMFT
Do you remember your teenage years? I sure do; the whirlwind of emotions, growth spurts, and eye rolls. It was a challenging time for all of us. As we learned to navigate independence and figure out who we were, our parents probably wondered what was happening in our heads, mainly because it wasn’t “cool” to talk to our parents because they wouldn’t “get it”. Are you experiencing this situation with your own teen? If you are, I’m sure it can feel like a rollercoaster most days. In this blog, I will provide you with tools you can utilize to deepen your connection with your teen and create a safe environment for your relationship to thrive through communication.
Tools for Connecting With Your Teen
“I don’t know what to do anymore” or “Where do I begin?” are some common statements among parents with teens. Let me ask you a question, What are you feeling in those complex moments with your teen? Have you ever been aware of this? Do you ever get flushed, notice your heart rate increasing, or yell? The first place to start with navigating these moments with your teen is becoming aware of your thoughts, feelings, and emotions.
When you notice you and your teen entering into a conversation remind yourself to be the water to their fire. You can’t fight fire with fire, so approaching with peace, empathy, and awareness will start the conversation off with a solid foundation. If you find that regulating your own emotions is difficult, try incorporating mindfulness into your day. For example, you can start your day by spending 5 minutes journaling, utilizing breathing techniques, and pausing for moments of gratitude throughout the day.
Step Into Their World
Empathy is the art of stepping into another's shoes, of experiencing their emotions as if they were your own. For parents, it's the ability to truly grasp the rollercoaster of feelings that adolescents ride daily. You can do this by remembering your teenage years – the excitement, the anxiety, the dreams, and the uncertainties. Your teenager's emotions may be different, but the intensity is familiar. Empathy can create a foundation of safety for your teen to open up with you.
However, empathy and non-judgment go hand-in-hand and it’s all too easy to slip into judgment when you’re a parent - to impose your experiences and expectations onto your teen's life. When your teenager expresses their thoughts or emotions, resist the urge to label or criticize their experience. Instead, create a haven where they feel free to be vulnerable without fearing criticism or punishment. Your role shifts from being an evaluator to a listener, which fosters an atmosphere of trust and open dialogue.
Pairing empathy and non-judgment with active listening can be the perfect communication cocktail. When your child knows you’re actively listening, it deepens the safety of your relationship, which deepens your connection. To actively listen you must have a mindful and engaged presence that reflects your commitment to understand what your teen might be trying to communicate. This is an opportunity for you to turn off the mental drafts of what you want to say next and be fully present. You can utilize reflective listening as well to confirm to them that they have been heard.
Somatic Techniques and Your Teen
As a teen, there are so many things happening at once within their inner selves. Not only are they learning to navigate a new body, but they’re also learning to navigate feelings and emotions that suddenly come up. Teens often grapple with a variety of feelings, ranging from excitement and curiosity to insecurity and frustration. As they journey through these intricate emotional realms, it's not uncommon for them to struggle with putting these emotions into words. Somatic techniques can be the supportive tool they need to make this connection between their mind and body. When they become more aware of what their body is communicating they will begin to learn how to articulate their emotions and what is occurring within their inner selves.
Final Thoughts
Building a lasting and loving relationship with your child yields an investment in yourself as well. We encourage you to support your teen by becoming aware of your own body and how it correlates to your emotions. Every step you take, and every conversation you have with your teen is just a brick that is being laid in the foundation of your relationship. We want you to remember that these connection goals take time. While you learn to have patience with your child, we encourage you to have patience with yourself as well.
Life By Design Therapy is here to support you and your family. If you are interested in learning more about how Somatic and Holistic Therapy can complement your life or your teen's life, we would love to hear from you. Please CLICK HERE to schedule your complimentary consultation and let’s figure out a plan together.
Additional Resources
If you would like additional resources on parent-teen communication, check out the reading list below.
How to Talk So Teens Will Listen & Listen So Teens Will Talk by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish
Brainstorm: The Power and Purpose of the Teenage Brain by Daniel J. Siegel MD
Get Out of My Life, but First Could You Drive Me & Cheryl to the Mall by Anthony E. Wolf
UnSelfie: Why Empathetic Kids Succeed in Our All-About-Me World by Michele Borba
**Some product links are affiliate links, which means we'll receive a commission if you purchase through our link, at no extra cost to you. Please read the full disclosure here.
Keys to Connection: Navigating Parent-Teen Communication
by Melody Wright, LMFT
Do you remember your teenage years? I sure do; the whirlwind of emotions, growth spurts, and eye rolls. It was a challenging time for all of us. As we learned to navigate independence and figure out who we were, our parents probably wondered what was happening in our heads, mainly because it wasn’t “cool” to talk to our parents because they wouldn’t “get it”. Are you experiencing this situation with your own teen? If you are, I’m sure it can feel like a rollercoaster most days. In this blog, I will provide you with tools you can utilize to deepen your connection with your teen and create a safe environment for your relationship to thrive through communication.
Tools for Connecting With Your Teen
“I don’t know what to do anymore” or “Where do I begin?” are some common statements among parents with teens. Let me ask you a question, What are you feeling in those complex moments with your teen? Have you ever been aware of this? Do you ever get flushed, notice your heart rate increasing, or yell? The first place to start with navigating these moments with your teen is becoming aware of your thoughts, feelings, and emotions.
When you notice you and your teen entering into a conversation remind yourself to be the water to their fire. You can’t fight fire with fire, so approaching with peace, empathy, and awareness will start the conversation off with a solid foundation. If you find that regulating your own emotions is difficult, try incorporating mindfulness into your day. For example, you can start your day by spending 5 minutes journaling, utilizing breathing techniques, and pausing for moments of gratitude throughout the day.
Step Into Their World
Empathy is the art of stepping into another's shoes, of experiencing their emotions as if they were your own. For parents, it's the ability to truly grasp the rollercoaster of feelings that adolescents ride daily. You can do this by remembering your teenage years – the excitement, the anxiety, the dreams, and the uncertainties. Your teenager's emotions may be different, but the intensity is familiar. Empathy can create a foundation of safety for your teen to open up with you.
However, empathy and non-judgment go hand-in-hand and it’s all too easy to slip into judgment when you’re a parent - to impose your experiences and expectations onto your teen's life. When your teenager expresses their thoughts or emotions, resist the urge to label or criticize their experience. Instead, create a haven where they feel free to be vulnerable without fearing criticism or punishment. Your role shifts from being an evaluator to a listener, which fosters an atmosphere of trust and open dialogue.
Pairing empathy and non-judgment with active listening can be the perfect communication cocktail. When your child knows you’re actively listening, it deepens the safety of your relationship, which deepens your connection. To actively listen you must have a mindful and engaged presence that reflects your commitment to understand what your teen might be trying to communicate. This is an opportunity for you to turn off the mental drafts of what you want to say next and be fully present. You can utilize reflective listening as well to confirm to them that they have been heard.
Somatic Techniques and Your Teen
As a teen, there are so many things happening at once within their inner selves. Not only are they learning to navigate a new body, but they’re also learning to navigate feelings and emotions that suddenly come up. Teens often grapple with a variety of feelings, ranging from excitement and curiosity to insecurity and frustration. As they journey through these intricate emotional realms, it's not uncommon for them to struggle with putting these emotions into words. Somatic techniques can be the supportive tool they need to make this connection between their mind and body. When they become more aware of what their body is communicating they will begin to learn how to articulate their emotions and what is occurring within their inner selves.
Final Thoughts
Building a lasting and loving relationship with your child yields an investment in yourself as well. We encourage you to support your teen by becoming aware of your own body and how it correlates to your emotions. Every step you take, and every conversation you have with your teen is just a brick that is being laid in the foundation of your relationship. We want you to remember that these connection goals take time. While you learn to have patience with your child, we encourage you to have patience with yourself as well.
Life By Design Therapy is here to support you and your family. If you are interested in learning more about how Somatic and Holistic Therapy can complement your life or your teen's life, we would love to hear from you. If you’re located in California, please click below to schedule your complimentary consultation and let’s figure out a plan together.
Additional Resources
How to Talk So Teens Will Listen & Listen So Teens Will Talk by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish
Brainstorm: The Power and Purpose of the Teenage Brain by Daniel J. Siegel MD
Get Out of My Life, but First Could You Drive Me & Cheryl to the Mall by Anthony E. Wolf
UnSelfie: Why Empathetic Kids Succeed in Our All-About-Me World by Michele Borba
Navigating Back-to-School Anxiety: Practical Tips for Parents
By Melody Wright, LMFT
Do you remember how it felt when you started a new school year? The excitement and nervousness, or maybe even anxiety as you wondered about the new uncharted territory, hoping to make new friends, impress your teachers, and navigate the challenges of being a year older. As this school year started, maybe you’ve had some of those memories resurface as you witness your own child experiencing those same emotions.
Back-to-school anxiety is perfectly normal, and as a parent, you have the power to be your child’s anchor, guiding them through the feelings of uncertainty with love, understanding, and support. In this blog, we will discuss strategies to support your child through their emotions and foster a positive mindset for the rest of the school year.
Identifying Signs of Back-to-School Anxiety
Back-to-school anxiety is common among students. However, recognizing the signs of anxiety in children is crucial for providing timely support and understanding. Common signs of this type of anxiety can show itself in physical symptoms such as headaches, and stomachaches, or they might say they don’t feel well, especially when school-related discussions come up.
You might also notice behavioral changes such as increased clinginess, crying, or restlessness. Mood swings, irritability, and changes in sleep patterns can also be a sign that your child is experiencing some anxiety. However, some children may exhibit avoidance behaviors, such as resisting going to school or expressing a strong desire to stay home. Academic performance may also be affected. Your child might have their grades decline or they might become obsessively worried about their school work.
Therapist Tip: Being attentive to these signals you can provide the necessary support and reassurance to help children cope with their emotions and navigate the back-to-school transition.
Strategies for Supporting Your Child
Establish a Consistent Routine - For those with anxiety, knowing what comes next can provide a sense of stability and predictability. Create space for consistent meal times, study times, and family times. Your child might also need support with creating a routine around hygiene and self-care as well.
Encourage Expressive Arts & Journaling - Some kids have a difficult time finding the words to use to express how they are feeling. Expressive arts is a great way to release the emotions being felt through music or creating art. Journaling is a supportive tool for those who do not feel like speaking to someone about what they are feeling. Journaling provides a safe space to be fully vulnerable.
Foster a Growth Mindset - Encourage a growth mindset in your child by emphasizing the importance of learning, growth, and perseverance. Remind them that mistakes are opportunities to learn and grow and that it's okay not to have all the answers right away. This mindset shift can reduce the fear of failure and increase your child's resilience in the face of challenges.
Introduce Grounding Techniques -Teaching your child grounding techniques can support their emotional regulation for the rest of their life. Practice deep breathing, and meditation, and consider a grounding object that they can carry with them in their pocket to school.
Collaborate with a Therapist - Open communication is essential for supporting your child through their struggle, however, that doesn’t always come easy. Meeting regularly with a therapist will allow your child to engage in consistent opportunities to be vulnerable in an unbiased, non-judgmental space.
Final Thoughts
Supporting your child through their back-to-school anxiety requires patience, understanding, and empathy. By creating a nurturing environment at home and implementing some of the techniques above you can support your child in navigating these unknown territories. Remember that every child’s journey is unique to them, so approach this process with love, support, and flexibility.
Also, we want to acknowledge that this is challenging and complex for parents as well. Give yourself an empathetic and non-judgmental space as you journey through this side of parenting. If you are needing support as a parent or if your child is needing support, connect with our team. We have qualified therapists who are equipped with the tools you need to move forward on this journey.
CLICK HERE to schedule your free phone consultation today.
Additional Resources
If you would like additional tools for supporting your child and yourself as a parent, check out the resources below.
How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish
Parenting with Love and Logic: Teaching Children Responsibility by Foster Cline and Jim Fay
Raising Critical Thinkers: A Parent's Guide to Growing Wise Kids in the Digital Ageby Julie Bogart
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I Worry About Keeping My Child Safe, What Can I Do?
By Melody Wright, LMFT
Becoming a parent can be one of the most rewarding, exciting, and joyous times in someone’s life. It can also be one of the scariest, overwhelming, and emotional times in a parent’s life – both sets of emotions are valid and can be felt at the same time. Leading up to the arrival of a new baby, many parents talk about things to prepare for such as the cost of childcare, how to set up the nursery, and each parent’s approach to child rearing. Once a child has arrived, many parents realize that there are many important topics that may not have been on their radar prior to the child’s birth. These topics can include addressing issues that occurred during childbirth (traumatic births, unplanned c-sections, etc.), unexpected health concerns for your child, and discussing safety concerns in order to keep a child protected. All of these topics can leave a parent wondering, in a world that is full of unexpected changes and factors, how can I keep my child safe?
Keeping a child safe can look different depending on the context and setting that you’re in. Is your child a newborn? You may be trying to keep them safe from illness or unnecessary exposure to germs. Is your child a teenager? You may be trying to keep your teenager safe from cyberbullying or negative peer pressure. In a perfect world, we would be able to provide protection to our children in all settings and at all ages, yet we know this is not always feasible or realistic. Children need exposure to different settings and situations in order to learn how to navigate the world on their own. That said, we can still do our best to protect our children within certain settings, and teach our children how to stay safe.
Keeping your child safe can include:
Protecting them from illnesses such as RSV, the Flu, or Covid. Encourage your child to wear a mask whenever they are indoors or in crowded places. Talk with your partner about your stance and choice on vaccinations that can protect your child from respiratory and other illnesses. Remind your child to practice basic hand hygiene whenever they touch others or frequently-touched surfaces.
Setting boundaries with friends, family, and loved ones. Our friends and families may have the best intentions for our children, but their intentions may not always be in alignment with our parenting approach. It is important that you relay your expectations to your family members regarding their interactions with your child (no kissing your newborn’s face, asking for consent before hugging your toddler, not making negative comments regarding a challenge your teen is experiencing). If those expectations are not met, then you can decide the level of contact that you’d like to continue to have with this family member.
Teaching your child skills for personal safety. While we always strive to do our best to protect our children from physical harm, we know there will be a day when they will need to learn how to keep themselves safe. Whether you choose to enroll your child in a self-defense class, or use daily interactions to teach your child how to assess for danger, preparing your children to keep themselves safe can put some of your worries at ease.
Additional resources to learn more about child safety can be found here:
Protecting your child from Covid: https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/coronavirus-young-kids.html
General safety tips for children: https://www.ahaparenting.com/read/top-safety-tips-kids
If you find yourself having overwhelming thoughts that your child will be harmed or consistent worries about your child’s health and well-being, you may benefit from speaking to one of our licensed therapists. Parents who have recently welcomed a child into their home can be particularly vulnerable to experiencing a Perinatal Mood Disorder after the delivery of a new child. A mood disorder can significantly affect how often a parent worries for their child’s safety, often to the point of losing sleep or being unable to attune to their child’s needs. Support and information from a mental health provider can begin to reduce a new parent’s concerns and improve their overall mood and attunement. For more information on connecting to one of our licensed therapists, click here.